Thursday, 1 November 2012

Karva Chod

It’s that time of the year again when women across North India fast for their wife-beating, raping, molesting, disrespecting, ugly and fat husbands. In fact, a lot of these unmarried PYTs also fast to showcase their dedication towards their to-be wife-beating, raping, molesting, disrespecting, ugly and fat husbands. It’s time for Karva Chauth.

This is the day when women proudly don’t eat or drink for a day just to ensure their husbands have a long life. Yes, because exercise and a good diet are passé. It’s Karva Chauth that will keep them healthy, wealthy and wise. No wonder these moustache donning, paunch showcasing, burpers, farters, borderline-alcoholics continue with their lethargic lifestyles because they know that back home they have a wife who’s going to do all the hardwork, even if that means she dies of hunger, to make sure the husband gets his daily dose of Tandoori Chicken and Royal Stag.

Before you give me gyaan about symbolism and what not, I’d like to stop you, make you sit on a La-Z-Boy, hypnotize you, molest you first, wake you up and then put my point across. In this time and age of woman empowerment and science and shit, it just seems absurd for ANY woman to go fasting for the good health of a husband who’s totally not worth the effort. In fact, what should happen is that those very husbands should take a day off from work, do the household chores, please the wifey down there, cook and do the dishes WITHOUT EATING OR DRINKING A THING.

For long the Indian society has been following absurd customs which have always been pro male and completely anti female. Be it sati or women eating from the used plates of their almighty husbands, women have always been given the broom so they could move on and clean the house. Some lucky ones would get to sleep on their rightful place on the bed if the husband is not drunk enough and hence hasn’t puked on the wife’s side of the bed. In spite of all the crap that STILL happens in India, like new born girls being drowned in milk, or pubescent 16 year old women being wed off to violent and horny 26 year old males from a staunch lower middle class mentality, or chicks from even the top Indian families not being allowed to study further or work after getting married; somehow the women still feel they need to show their dedication for the Indian man.

Women, the Indian man is a pig. Period. Not your period, but the full stop kinda period.

Beware, they won’t do shit for you. They’ll continue treating you like shit. It’s in our blood to treat you like a woman and feel furious if you’re better than us in anything at all, except for giving blowjobs of course. Just be a piece of meat and you‘ll keep them happy and satisfied. Give it back to them I say. If not tie up their balls to a cactus, at least don’t lick them either. Stay brave, stay equal. We men are not the better species, in fact, in all probability, we’re worse.

Say no to Karva Chauth. This festive season, KARVA CHOD! 


  1. I'm not a fan of the Karva Chauth tradition either. Always felt if a woman's fasting for the sake of the husband's well being, in the man's muddled mind it makes the woman few notches below him. Most men and women will disagree with your blog post and my comment. Deep down they do know they're probably doing it because they need to. It's a tradition after all.

    1. Exactly. In the name of tradition, we're continuing to just prove that, as you mentioned, a woman is a few notches below man in India. There might be no direct harm following this whole thing, but then they probably don't realise that it's not really a good for the Indian woman. Gaah! I guess with time it'll fade off. Hoping for that, at least.

  2. Very True... Why can't men practice it??? And, they say "Men and Women are Equal." Even on this day of so called Karva Chauth are the women in India, treated the way they should be??? I doubt... Is there a day, wherein the man does something special for his wife???

    1. There's nothing that the Indian man does for a woman. Other than the few who do it willfully, there's nothing out culture has where and Indian man has to sacrifice something. Anything.

  3. Another useless ritual devised by paunchy men of (psuedo) faith to convince man of his superiority over women. The ironic bit is most females support this awful notion, educated or otherwise. Their sons can do no wrong by virtue of having puny things dangling between their legs, while the daughters must learn to do chores, cater to the men, not speak their minds and generally dumb themselves down lest the males of the family be offended, or worse, an aforementioned man of paunch doesnt do her the favor of marrying her.

    With reference to Sati, i assume dying a horrible death while becoming tandoor is the accepted yardstick for not abolishing meaningless and sexist rituals. Which of course is keeping in with the high standards of reason and logic we subject all our societal acts to.

    But hey, i'm a guy, why should i complain? Have shlong, can do no wrong. Its unfortunate you disagree with that. Well done.

    1. "Shlong... Sounds wet!"

      But yes, maybe not everyone is like that but then again a lot are. This stuff needs to be abolished for good I feel. Not that I'm personally against it but I don't think it's doing anyone any good. Especially the women in our society. It's not like they're the most respected lot, but these things will ensure that things improve at a crawling rate. Quite sad.

  4. A very apt portrayal of "The Indian Man" or should I just say men globally instead coz there aint much difference! Yes there are wife beating, cheating men who get their jollies off seeing women in pain...thts sick yes, but then I have seen men who work all day long, sweat their asses off go out in the real world and endure to keep their families fed and also oblige to their "needs" (jewelry, cars, phones, ipads, iphones...the list goes on!) while their wives stay protected / shelled from a quite a many things I tell you! I don't say these real / existing nice men deserve to be worshiped or fasted for but you can't tell a woman how to show her devotion to a man...she will do it if need be by going w/o water n food for a week not just a day. That is emotion only women are capable of.

    Every religion / tradition is based upon a fundamental principal.. none holds absolutely..I mean we might burn the Ravan every year but still continue to indulge in wrong. Now just bcz evil exists inspite of us symbolically burning it does not mean we stop believing in the victory of good over evil. Instead we try to reinforce it by practicing this tradition every year...! The same goes here.

    I don't justify any tradition being forced upon people but then again lets not forget it exists for a reason...this reason sometimes so subtle can go un-noticed... think bout that :)

    1. You know, it's like if the environment gets so screwed in time that even a bit of pollution could end life as we know it, I'd be against burning Raavans too. I mean it's not like I'm all pro it, in the name of culture and tradition and religion we can't go around spoiling the environment so bad. The times have changed we need to be more careful now. Hence the festival needs to be celebrated in a different manner, wherein it does not hurt anything or anyone. Just be symbolic. DOn't stop celebrating the victory of good over evil, but then let's not go overboard doing it.

      Also, I was just stereotyping men. I of course know there is good in this world and not every man is a rapist. It was done only to put my point across.

      The problem with Karwa Chauth is that it might seem to be a harmless tradition, but it goes deeper than that I feel. On the outside we may see that our mothers and wives and sisters and friends are all keeping fasts because they want to and not because they are being forced to do it, but then at a very fundamental level what you're doing does not in any way promote equality, it in fact undermines the value of a woman in a way and showcases her a level lower than man. Which is not cool at all especially in the Indian society. Where women still are not treated right.

      Umm. Yeah. :)

    2. Yes we aren't treated right, and ya someday we may have to stop burning Ravan maybe we will substitute the ritual by beheading it / how Ram did strike an effigy on the waist... adjustment is required with every passing second that's how we evolve, putting forth rational points of view...but if you tell a woman that something she does out of love for her partner should be called "Karva CHOD"! well that you might want to reconsider. I appreciate your effort and sentiment behind it but really Karva CHOD.... naaaaa ;)

    3. The festival, is a good luck and a symbolism of prayers that wives conduct before(in the predominantly farmer community of North India) sowing the seeds for a rabi crop.

      Also, The festival is a prayer for the well being of husband in times of war which were predominantly done during this period when monsoon waters receded completely, and river streams were flowing in a definite course.

      Thats history. In modern times, we need a symbolism of a wives love for her husband.

      brandishing this should also then amount to brandishing Valentines day and all symbols of love between a male and a female, because as has been generalised all males are wife beating, drunkards, who molest and rape any women whose utterence is taken as sexual content....

      Sounds illogical: ummmm Yeah

      Fanaticism is begun by generalisation, and dats whats happening here....

      you guys are no better than people without a spine or intelligence to be appreciative and see the positive side.

      Lord help your wife Mr. RaVarma, coz u dont have a mind blessed enough to see anything positive, and sir, equality can be attained by honouring other peoples opinion....

      I could also, push you on a lazyboy, or even better the ground and Molest you and then say, Sweets the brighter side of life now is that u are no more a virgin in the ass.....

      Thank God i am not you......

    4. @Mists Of Time - Well of course the extremist view that I have taken is just to prove my point. Keeping it mild never really gets the attention an issue deserves. Or maybe I don't have the skills to do that yet. But anyway, Karwa Chod has just been used out of humour, I know it's crass, but I tend to go overboard with crap like this at times, but all in good faith. Not like I ask my mum not to do it. This is all for the sake of this blog. Hence no offence meant, my apologies if any taken.

    5. There's no war happening right now and neither are you farming. We all live comfortable lives and the condition of women has gotten much worse than earlier times in many a ways. Not saying that it hasn't got any better. But there's still room for improvement, a lot, and there's a lot more awareness now which has really paved the way for woman empowerment.

      So a woman sacrificing anything for a man, on a fundamental level, as I insist again, is not good for her. It is still ingrained in our culture, inside us, that women are the inferior kind.

      What I've done here is play around on the stereotype. Not all men are rapists, obviously. I'm not. It's only been done to prove a point and to talk about the bigger evil that still affects women all across the country. At times, you do need to generalise.

      Although a lot of women do it out of their own will but then again so many don't. For their sake, we need to go a little slow is my opinion. I know this piece is not written in good taste and very crass language has been used, but then again, that's just the way I write at times. I want people to react and put forth their views, which then I can again counter, like this.

      Didn't mean to offend anyone, or maybe I did. Apologies for the same. CHeers!

  5. Biggest troll would be RaVarma's own gf/wife keeping a fast for him!

    1. Hahaha you're one troll kanya! :P

  6. A man is the most beautiful part of God's creation who starts compromising at a very tender age.
    He sacrifices his chocolates for sister.
    He sacrifices his dreams for just smile on his parents face.
    He spends his entire pocket money on buyng gifts for the girl he loves just to see her smiling
    He sacrifices his full youth for his wife & children by working late at night without any complain.
    He builds their future by takng loans from banks & repayng them for lifetime.
    He struggles a lot & still has to bear scolding from his mother, wife & boss.
    His mother, wife & boss all try to control him.
    His life finally ends up only by compromising for others happiness.
    Respect every male in your life.
    You will never know what he has sacrificed for you.

    Hope there are more men like this out there!!!

  7. Yes RaVarma, stop 'brandishing' karva chauth...whatever that means.
    (apologies for nitpicking)

  8. :-)). It is a north Indian custom...and made glamorous by TV and Karan johars. Let them do the fast and be thankful to the husbands. What is the harm?

    I also notice that younger women of today are questioning a lot practices . They are also expecting a lot from husbands/ boy friends, unlike their mothers.

  9. It's not about personal choice here. What I really want to abolish is any practice that downgrades a woman, even if it's her personal choice. The whole broad idea about women being inferior to men is still pretty prevalent in India. Till that is not completely erased, we must not follow any customs which add to the fire. Once we're all cool, once we all understand that we're all equals, then all the women who want fast for their husbands are welcomed to do so.

  10. Incidentally - some men do practice it without due credit, recognition or blog posts. But I guess that is just the minority.

    One article on the Good men of India
    And the response

    THe comments on both those articles tell the real tale.

    1. Haha interesting. Finally read these articles. Don't think I agree with the woman too much!

  11. These men hating women... uff.... Koi inki help kare to flirt... nahi kare to rude.... These new age women also consider politeness as flirting...