Pubic Interest Litigation

“Animal rights NGO files PIL against Salman Khan for Ek ‘Tha’ Tiger. Since it’s in past tense they are talking about a dead tiger and hence promoting killing the few remaining tigers.”

“Fevicol to sue Dabangg 2 producers for using their brand name in a song.”

“A flop dancer in Mumbai appeals to the public on Twitter to force an apology from a leading TV baron who said ‘fuck’ to her father.”

This world is being taken over by idiots. And this world is, apparently, going to end. Co-incidence much? I think not.

The first two scenarios mentioned at the beginning might or might not be true, but the last one surely is. Taking undue advantage of her significant following, a so called ‘Tweleb’ is raging about how her father was disrespected by a respected (or not so much) member of the TV/film fraternity. ‘Apparently’, I say apparently because there is no proof yet, other than her ‘word’, her father was called an ‘old fool’ or some such. This disgrace goes even further when reports surfaced that the F-bomb, which is of course the foulest expletive ever, was thrown towards her father. And to make it a life threatening situation, an incidence which could cripple any man for life, he was shown the finger. Thankfully she did not do katti with him. That would’ve broken his heart then and there.

Who in this world has ever asked somebody to fuck off, right? Have you ever shown the finger to someone? Of course not. And yeah we respect each and every old man in this world so much that we touch their feet at their very sight. This is the world we live in na? How dare anyone even look at that old man in the eye?

Gaah! Give me a FUCKING break.

We all curse like there’s no tomorrow and the middle finger is used as often as we used to use our little finger while at school to tell the world that we needed to pee. Most old people are a little slow and it gets a little difficult for our fast generation to deal with them. I’m not saying that we should go ahead and keep dissing these oldies at will but don’t you dare say that you’ve never cursed, albeit under your breath, some random old man on the road driving his car at 38 kmph. Or that annoying old man who keeps giving you gyaan about life whenever you cross his house.

All our teachers and bosses and seniors and even parents at times have been subjected to incidences of outrage by youngsters who’ve been unable to cope with them. I’m not trying to defend any of these ‘immoral’ activities but then let’s not make a hue and cry about it. We’ve all done it. We’ve all said kya kutiya hai bhancho under our muffled breath to that teacher in school who was very strict. Obviously that translates to what a bitch for all you preppies. I’ve even heard a friend of mine say my dad’s such an ass. Grandparents are obviously worse. It’s a natural progression of life where there is a slight gap in understanding between a particular generation and the one preceding it.

Why go ahead and demand a public apology for an incident as lame as this where an influential and powerful person calling a regular old bloke an old fool. Just try and look at yourself in the mirror first (apne girebaan mein jhaank ke dekho) and picture yourself react when the old guard of your colony fails to recognise you at night when you come back from a crazy party and does not let you enter for a minute or two (before he adjusts his glasses and recognises the cute dolly beti who’s all grown up now) . Or the look you give to an old beggar trying to walk across your car after the light at the junction has been turned green who ends up wasting six seconds of your precious life.

I reiterate that I am not trying to say what happened was right but then raging over such a puny incident is pretty lame. Deal with it; move on. Give your old man a hug of reassurance and tell him that you’ll go and withdraw the money for him instead of raging on Twitter and getting idiotic sympathy votes from your six thousand followers who’ve got nothing better to do in life. In case you want an apology, everybody should first apologise to Tusshar Kapoor for making fun of him. If you can’t make a public apology for making fun of Jeetendra for wearing a white shirt, white pants, white socks, white shoes, a white underwear, a white condom, a white nappy, white teeth, white hair, then bitch, please.